Jason Harrison

I dress pretty much like a child on most days. Take a look at a school bus stop near you, and then take a look at what I wear to work every day. You’ll struggle to notice a difference (other than the balding hair line and aging face). Despite my propensity for dressing like an adolescent, somewhere along the line I got subscribed to the J Crew catalogue for men. Maybe they felt sorry for me.

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I was flipping through the catalogue and I happened upon this bit of copy that I haven’t been able to get out of my head:

Stretch Jeans That Don’t Look Stretchy

That’s the title. And there’s a thin looking model dude bounding down some urban steps on his way probably to jump on a bike to grab some organic sushi or something.

“Thanks to top-quality Japanese fabric we source from one of that country’s original denim mills, they look just like all of our famous jeans. Which means now you can wear slim denim and eat doughnuts.” (emphasis in the original quote)

This copy bothers me on three fronts.

1.) The Settling

You know what? Forget it. Just wear stretchy jeans. You’ll never fit into regular jeans anyway. So here’s some stretchy fabric that might look decent for your fat butt and fat thighs and fat stomach. Fatty.

That’s what I read in this ad. Juxtaposed with the skinny dude accompanying the copy, I just find this offensive.

2.) Overeating = Only Reason Skinny Jeans Don’t Fit

The second thing that bothers me about this ad is the idea that eating to excess would be the only reason that someone can’t fit into some skinny jeans. Let me tell you something. Try to imagine an octopus on dry land riding a unicycle. That’s what I look like trying to put on a pair of skinny jeans. My ass and thighs just simply refuse to be associated with skinny jeans. They don’t want to be in the same room with them. They’re offended by the idea of skinny jeans.

And it ain’t the donuts.

It’s the squats, deadlifts, lunges, good mornings, Romanian deadlifts, and kettlebell swings. Don’t get me wrong, I can put away some donuts. But these thighs just ain’t ever gonna fit into skinny jeans. So why condescend to the people you’re selling to by suggesting that the only reason one might not fit into skinny jeans is that they overeat? I get it. It’s supposed to be funny. But, no. That’s a swing and a miss.

3.) It’s Just Bad Marketing

The thing I can’t shake about this copy is that it’s just bad marketing. It doesn’t fit the brand. J Crew usually seems to be marketing to a relatively sophisticated group of people who care a little about the fabric, the aesthetic, the origin of the clothes they’re wearing. Right? So why would you wink and nod to a guy sitting on the couch with his hand down his pants mainlining powdered donuts? It’s just the wrong audience.

Sometimes when you’re selling something, especially an aesthetic, cute just isn’t the way to go. And if you’re going to wade into what I think are the much needed waters of sizing clothing for a diverse group of bodies, don’t insult the very people to which you’re ostensibly marketing. I don’t know much. But I know that.

There are two things I do as a personal trainer that you can implement immediately in your own workout regimen. I take detailed notes, and I increase weight incrementally. The first will just cost you the price of a notebook (Moleskine baby!), and the second might prompt you do join a different gym or to make purchases to round out your home gym.

The Power of Notes

I’ve not always been a good trainer. For many years I would say I was very bad. But I managed to get results for clients despite this because I’ve always taken good notes. That means I know exactly how many sets and reps you performed last week, I know what you’re struggling to grasp, and I know if it’s time to increase the weight for a particular movement. That’s all in the notes.

If you’re working out on your own now and you don’t have any injuries but you’ve been struggling to make progress, start taking notes. When you struggle with an exercise, write that down. What happened? Where did you go wrong? Take a video of yourself squatting. How was your form? Did you lean forward? Did your heels pop off the floor or did your left foot pronate? Taking notes of anomalies can help you address them during the next workout.

The Power of Incremental Progress

This note-taking is directly linked to another factor that can dramatically affect how much you’re getting out of the gym: increasing the load that you’re moving during your workouts.

Let’s say you’re still in the beginner’s stage of strength training and you’re using a basic 3 sets of 10 repetitions for your exercises. If you were doing a goblet squat for 3 sets of 10 repetitions using a 35-pound kettlebell last month, then you should be using a heavier one this month. Understand that this scenario presupposes that you’re still fairly early in your strength training life, so that a basic linear progression (add more weight next week than you’re using this week) still yields results. If you’re an intermediate or advanced lifter then you won’t be able to add weight to the bar forever. In the beginning, however, it’s not a bad idea to keep things simple. Just keep adding weight when you hit your goal of 3 sets of 10 repetitions.

If you’re working out in your home gym, a really underrated investment is small “change plates,” which are the barbell weights that come in sizes like 2.5 pounds, 5 pounds, or 7.5 pounds. You also can get them in smaller increments, like 1.25 pounds or .5 pound. It seems silly, but these tiny increments can help you increase your work capacity slowly over time. Then when you’re ready to convert to more sophisticated percentage-based programming, you’ll be all set when the day calls for a back squat at 77.5 percent of your one-rep max: you’ll have the change plates to get you as close to the actual number you’re lifting as possible. Not all gyms have change plates in small increments, but it might be worth looking for one that does.

You don’t need a lot of different exercises in the beginning of your fitness journey. And once again, the idea of “muscle confusion” is a fiction peddled by people trying to sell yo things you don’t need. You don’t want confused muscles; you want strong, smart muscles that know what the hell they’re doing. You’re not going to build those by hopping around to different exercises every week. And you can’t develop smart muscles without holding them accountable for what they’re doing: that means a combination of notes and incremental weight increases.

A guy walked into my gym the other day and asked me if I offered memberships. “No,” I told him. “This is a personal training and private yoga studio.”

“Oh, because I don’t need a personal trainer,” he said. “Do you offer any quick bootcamp style classes? I just want to get rid of my belly. I already know what I’m doing.”

“Well,” I replied, “your belly is probably more about what you’re eating than anything else. A bootcamp isn’t necessarily the answer.”

“I’m a vegetarian,” he said, “and I already eat clean.”

At that point I just wanted him to get out of the gym as quickly as possible.

I like when neighbors pop in and ask questions. I like to give as much information away for free as I can. And I especially love the idea of people in Dayton seeing my place as a resource. Personal training is expensive, but I’m confident that there are enough people who see the value in my services that I can give away information as a sort of good neighbor policy. I do it all the time.

But nothing annoys me more than when people ask me questions to which they already pretend to know the answer.

Especially when they’re so, so, so wrong. I just don’t understand walking into someone else’s place of work with that level of arrogance.

Believe it or not, there are people who spend a lot of time figuring out how to get specific body compositions.

Here’s where my rude visitor went wrong. There are a few issues tangled up into his presumptive line of questioning.

1.) “Abs,” or body composition: One can be weak and have visible abs. One can be strong and have visible abs. One can be healthy and have visible abs. One can be unhealthy and have visible abs. One can eat vegan and have visible abs. One can eat Paleo and have visible abs. If your goal is abs–you can tell it’s not my favorite goal in the world–then telling me that you’re a vegetarian doesn’t do much to help me get you there.

2.) “Eating clean”: I’ve written before that people often tell me they’re eating clean when what they’re really doing is not eating enough to sustain their activity level. These people often have trouble achieving their body composition goals because they’re constantly catabolizing muscle just to stay alive.

3.) “Bootcamps” are the answer: Think about the logic of a bootcamp for a second, and think about where the terminology comes from. When a military recruit goes to bootcamp, they’re reporting to a purposefully challenging entry point to a career in which they will be asked to fight and possibly die with their brothers and sisters. Meeting at the park for abs exercises and calling it a bootcamp sort of misses the point.

Aside from the nomenclature, the real issue with a bootcamp style class is that you’re throwing twenty people into a group of varying skill levels, fitness, and injury histories and asking them all to do essentially the same thing. Sure, a good teacher will suggest modifications, but it’s difficult to ensure that five people are on point with their form, let alone twenty.

I’m not against all classes. We live in an area rich with them led by really good coaches. I’m against the idea of a class built upon the false and potentially dangerous notion that hard work alone–not programming, not form, not nutrition, not sleep, and not recovery–is the pathway for an unfit person to achieve abs or a “summer ready” body.

Use Your Eyes and Ears, Not Your Mouth

I’ve said before in this space that you don’t need a personal trainer or a coach. That’s true, but only if you’re willing to admit that you don’t know what you’re doing and you’re willing to put the time in researching, asking questions, and listening.

I’ve been doing this for a long time now, and I continue to research, ask questions, and listen. I can’t imagine training people now the way I did even five years ago, which means I’ve learned a lot in that time, discarded some techniques I once thought were sound, and added new ones. If you’re a lawyer or an architect with only a passing interest in fitness, why would you think it would be any different for you? So just shush for a moment and listen to the strong man or woman wearing the shorts. They might just know a little more about you when it comes to fitness.

I’m a proud Ohioan. I grew up here, I went to school here, and I cheer as hard for the Ohio State Buckeyes as anyone else. The state and specifically the community of Dayton has been incredibly kind and supportive of my business and my approach to fitness. But I’m troubled by what I see as an empathy chasm, which I’ll define in this context as a gap between our purported values and our demonstrated ability to put them into action.

Last week I wrote a bit about my own empathy blind spot when it came to homosexuals, and how I, unfortunately, required personal experience to understand the unquestioned humanity of our gay brothers and sisters. I grew up ignorant, I went to college and met a lot of gay people, and I learned from the experience. I’m a better person because of that growth.

Details are still emerging about the horrific attack against an Orlando gay club, but I think we can all stipulate that the gunman targeted the club because it was a sanctuary for gay people.

If you can't wrap your head around a bar or club as a sanctuary, you've probably never been afraid to hold someone's hand in public.

— Jeramey Kraatz (@jerameykraatz) June 12, 2016

I’ve been thinking about the stories I’ve heard from gay clients over the years. Stories about coming out to hostile parents; stories about punishing verbal and emotional abuse from peers; stories about feeling unsafe and vulnerable in cities with smaller gay populations.

My wife and I spent a recent weekend in Brooklyn and were surrounded by gay couples chatting, drinking coffee, going to the movies, and walking their dogs. I rarely see open displays of basic coupling among gays here in Dayton (outside of specific sanctuaries)–and I assure you it’s not because we don’t have a significant gay population. It’s because we are more hostile to homosexuals here.

The hostility isn’t necessarily overt. Our reputation here in the Midwest is for being unfailingly polite. “Please,” “thank you,” and “pardon me.” But that propensity for politeness, coupled with our relatively high degree of religious faith, mask an underlying empathy chasm for people who may love, make love, or identify with gender differently than you do.

My Facebook feed has been full of sympathetic Ohioans expressing outrage at the shooting in Orlando. (I’m not as interested in those armchair quarterbacking antiterrorism experts who wouldn’t know the difference between Saudi Arabia, Iran, and Pakistan if you gave them a map and a month’s head start to begin reading.) I’m fascinated by the polite, seemingly helpful, and kindhearted mourners who express condolences along with the ubiquitous “thoughts and prayers.”

These social media posts often begin with “while I may not agree with their lifestyle,” or “they’re sinners just like me,” “whatever they want to do behind closed doors is fine,” or some version of an argument that dismisses the validity of how gay people live their lives while simultaneously acknowledging that crimes against them are terrible.

"Love the sinner, hate the sin" is homophobia wrapped in a sanctimonious platitude.

— Broderick (@BroderickGreer) June 14, 2016

This is not enough. An empathetic, welcoming, diverse, inclusive society recognizes not just the humanity of gay people but also the basic validity of two men (or women) loving, kissing, and making love. I’ve overhead enough homophobia and felt enough of it in my own heart at one point to understand that what makes so many people uncomfortable is gay sex acts. This is precisely why polite, otherwise loving people go on Facebook and say things like “love the sinner, hate the sin.” The sin, in other words, is the gay sex.

I remember saying to a gay classmate during my freshman year at Ohio State that I found the idea of gay sex “disgusting,” but that I would never discriminate against a gay person. I thought I was being inclusive and open-minded, but really I was creating a hostile and even permissively violent environment for my fellow students by denying them their right to express physical love without scorn.

People argue that their religion teaches that homosexuality is a sin. I have no counter to this, and I doubt anything that I could write would change anyone’s mind. But expressing public condolences infused with judgment or disgust, all the while masquerading as inclusive or open-minded is not at all helpful. Worse, it reveals a profound discomfort with and disregard for the fully formed humanity of our neighbors.

By framing our understanding of people whose sexual orientation is different than ours as sinners, we diminish our capacity for empathy. This in turns makes our country, our society, and our community less well. Kelly McGonigal in her 2013 TED Talk made explicit the connection between how we deal with stress and our capacity and need for empathy.

Here’s part of what she had to say:

Oxytocin is a neuro-hormone. It fine-tunes your brain’s social instincts. It primes you to do things that strengthen close relationships. Oxytocin makes you crave physical contact with your friends and family. It enhances your empathy. It even makes you more willing to help and support the people you care about. Some people have even suggested we should snort oxytocin… to become more compassionate and caring. But here’s what most people don’t understand about oxytocin. It’s a stress hormone. Your pituitary gland pumps this stuff out as part of the stress response. It’s as much a part of your stress response as the adrenaline that makes your heart pound. And when oxytocin is released in the stress response, it is motivating you to seek support. Your biological stress response is nudging you to tell someone how you feel, instead of bottling it up. Your stress response wants to make sure you notice when someone else in your life is struggling so that you can support each other. When life is difficult, your stress response wants you to be surrounded by people who care about you. (emphasis mine)

A well city is an empathetic one. We can be a well city in which gay couples can feel comfortable being themselves, holding hands if the mood strikes, or stealing a kiss along the river. But not until and unless we collectively get over our discomfort with the very idea of gay sex. When as a freshman I told my classmate that I was disgusted by the idea of gay sex, what I was really saying to him was that I was disgusted with a fundamental piece of who he was as a man. And if you think I’m wrong, ask yourself how important your sex life is to you and how fundamental it is to expressing your love to the person closest to you.

As a personal trainer, I hear about people’s darkest secrets. I hear about the demons that have tormented them since childhood. It’s because of this that I so often write about empathy. I know just how integral it is to a healthy, well-rounded, fulfilling human experience. Many of us think we exhibit it at the same time our attitudes, actions, and language make life miserable for our neighbors.

You want to make Dayton a healthy city? Make it a welcoming city–for everyone.

There really is no disputing the fact that strength training is good for everyone. But when we think of “everyone,” we tend to leave out people in their 40s, 50s, 60s, and 70s, as if there is no benefit to beginning a strength training regimen when one becomes too old to go to the club.

What should strength training for older populations look like? And what are some of the special considerations for pumping iron when one pushes into the fifth decade of life? I’m going to answer these questions with an eye toward people who have never worked out before.

Recovery Time

If you’re older and you’ve decided to start lifting weights, understand that you’ll need to do weight-bearing exercise at least two days a week. In fact, for the first several months I wouldn’t advise you to do much more than that if you’re not currently active. Your aging body will need more recovery time in between workouts than someone who’s younger or someone who’s been working out for years. (And you’ll need no less than two days because getting stronger is a learning process that requires repetition.)

If you’re seeing a trainer, try establishing a Monday/Thursday or Tuesday/Friday split. You’re going to need those couple of days in between sessions to recover. A lot of times people will ask, “what about cardio?” If you’re older, one of the best things you can do in between lifting sessions is to walk for thirty minutes. The purpose of these walks isn’t to “burn more calories,” but to aid in your recovery from lifting sessions and to develop your cardiovascular capacity. Walk at a brisk pace twice a week in addition to your strength workouts and you’ll be happy with the way you feel. The great thing about walking is it’s a simple, low-impact exercise that you can do for the rest of your life. 

Learning

People feel shame around the fact that they’re not already in great shape. So they avoid trying to get into shape because they feel like they already should be. Pretty vicious cycle, right? Well, it’s not too late, and there’s no reason for you to feel ashamed. Just be ready for the fact that it might take you longer than your 20-year-old nephew to pick up some of the basics.

You’ve been moving the way you move for five decades or more, and if one assumes that some of those movement patterns aren’t the most efficient, then it follows that you’re going to have to learn new movement patterns in order to lift weights safely. This can take time–and that’s okay.

The older my client is, the more time I spend on the most basic movements like squatting. It can take several weeks just to get someone to the point at which they’re ready to work hard. Again, that’s okay. The key here is patience and an understanding that learning how to move is at least half the reason one should lift weights. It’s not just about getting leaner or a number on the scale. Longterm quality of life hinges upon good movement, and you’ll neither learn how to move well on your couch nor sitting on a bicep curl machine. Stand up!

Terminology

Chances are if you’ve never stepped foot in a gym by the time you’re 40, then it’s safe to say that working out isn’t your thing. So it’s likely that you’re not going to be familiar with a lot of the terminology of the gym. It’s relatively important for you to pay attention to the way people talk about the human body so that people around you (like personal trainers, doctors, chiropractors, etc.) can help you.

I had a client once tell me that they felt like an exercise was “pulling” on their leg. I had them immediately stop with the forceful concern of a parent who was watching their child head to a light socket with scissors.

“What’s wrong?” they asked.

“A pulling sensation is not good,” I said, “so we need to stop and evaluate what’s going on.”

“Well, maybe pulling isn’t the right word,” said my client. Turns out, by “pulling” my client actually meant “burning” or “difficult.” They were feeling the lunges in their quads just as they were supposed to be feeling them. But because they used terminology I associate with potential injury risk, I made them stop. This type of interaction happens a lot with people who aren’t accustomed to using or paying attention to their body.

You Can Do This

Don’t let the marketing around fitness fool you. This is for you too. I’ve never had an aging client tell me that strength training wasn’t worth it, even among those people who didn’t see a quick transformation in body composition. Just feeling better was worth the price of admission.

Aging doesn’t have to mean painful lower backs, using walkers to get around, and leaning on railings to get up and down from the toilet. It’s only that way in our culture because people stop moving. If you’re reading this I want you to know it’s not too late for you to avoid immobility and weakness. All you have to do is strap on the sneakers and be willing to learn.